Identity Crisis

I still don't know what to put up in this blog. Like some sort of teenager, i'm still trying to find my blog's identity. That's why I named this "Guide to Cooking (Anything and Everything You Can Imagine), so I don't have to limit myself in what I write.

I can say that I'm a frustrated writer. I do write senseless stuff and what-nots. When I was in highschool, I signed up for our school organ, since I really AM a frustrated (no, not good, not good at all) writer. Fortunately, I was accepted (I reckon its because there are only six of us who tried out). And guess what, for four long years of being a member of that organ, I never had any of my articles published. I tried submitting for like the first two years: news, features, literary articles, poems, short stories, but not even the shortest bit of phrase I wrote was there. After two years of writing and submitting and hoping and being disappointed, I stopped writing. I guess nobody is interested in what I am saying. I guess they don't really care about a loser like me. Or I guess I'm just so stupid that what I write is just some cracked-pot product of my stupidity. I guess the reason would be the latter.



So before I start boring further my one already bored reader (who I reckon was just accidentally passing by my god-forsaken blog), I should stop here.



But if you, yes you who's reading this right now (I guess I'm just talking to myself. lol), what can you suggest to make my blog stand-out?! And how the hell could I get so many hits here?! I guess I shouldn't write anything stupid like what I wrote a few minutes ago. Anyway, I'm just a newbie here in the blogosphere, and I really don't know how to "blog" or whatever. Can you just give me any suggestions please??!



I guess I just don't want to be that loser who never got an article published in their school organ, eh? I guess I wanna make it big, here, on the cyberspace, here on the loser-squad's blog of mine. I guess I wanna be known for SOMETHING, because I am not even known for ANYTHING really. That's why I'm a speckofdust. That's why I'm a loser.

The Tranquil Soul of the World

The painter had a sudden surge of inspiration
He rose from the decaying seat of rot

He gathered all his strength to paint

One last piece he'd show the world

The day of tranquil has come

The storm that swept the lands

Left everything broken and damned

Trees stood lifeless, roads cracked

Grasses were like patches green

Covering the muddy land with sin

The painter tried to paint these all

He opened cans of colors anew
The green he spilled

The yellow gone

Red was blood with nothing left

Blue was the sky he cannot reach

The brown he missed, he never looked

The bright orange he dared not hold

Nothing he saw could paint what he called

"The Tranquil Soul of the World" he saw

No color could fill the gap

Only black remains,

The scene left untold.

What Ends A Life?

What a way to start my blog. So, what ends a life?

Death. I've read from Tuesdays With Morrie that when we learn how to die, we will learn how to live. It is when we embrace the concept of death that we can appreciate the simplest things around us. When we know and we truly believe that our life will end soon, then we would take time to see things as they are, not from our point of view, but from the perception of reality. We would learn how to walk slowly, how beautiful the trees lining the sidewalk are, how soft the wind blows, how high the tallest buildings can be, how hot summer days are, and how brutally cold the winter nights feel. But amidst the tortures of these seasons, amidst the chilly wind, amidst anything, we learn that these things are beautiful, and we will learn that these things are gifts for us. Sometimes, just like Christmas, when we open our gifts, the small packages are often left behind, often to be opened last. Only when we have opened the big ones can we find the little ones left unopened under the christmas tree. Just like death. When we have fully appreciated the concept of death, how big it is and how greatly it affects the people around us, can we find pleasures and beauty in the smaller things. Yes, truly, we will know how to live.

Many of us are afraid of death. But it is not really the concept of dying that scares us. It is facing the unknown. Like what Dumbledore said to Harry in the cave (Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince), "It is only the unknown we fear when we look upon death and darkness, nothing more". It is comforting to find that there are some things much terrifying than death. Thus, it makes us easier to face death, to embrace it, and to finally live.